GameFreak aren’t lazy. They’re just incompetent.
I’ll kick this off by saying that I ain’t gonna start cracking
off statistics about how easy it is to actually animate a ‘double kick’ attack,
but if you want that info, it is on reddit. Reddit isn’t happy, and when that
happens, you know they stole the idea from 4Chan, and that means it’s only a
matter of time before Facebook and Instagram pick up on the hype.
So in case you haven’t heard, GF (not the Godfather, that
would make this at least a little cool) have decided that not all Pokemon are
worthy of entering the Galar region, mirroring the actual UK policy of denying access
to the country for people we don’t deem as worth our time. I mean, why make the
effort to give another human being a life that may one day be as good as ours,
right?
The Gen 8 Galar Dex will take the total number of Pokemon to
over 1000, which means we are another 160 years off the return of the ‘over
9000’ meme, and although the tears pour out as I’m writing this, I’m sure we
will all live on. A lot of people who are defending the decision have brought
up previous Pokemon games as a reason why over 1000 unique models and animations
is a lot of work for one studio, and even more people have pointed out that
they’re still reusing the old animations and models from the Gen 5 living Pokedex
on the DSI or 3DS whichever one it was. I don’t care about that. I don’t wanna
compare GameFreak to GameFreak, that’s like comparing apples and slightly
shittier, worse animated yet even less apples. I want to compare GameFreak to
Ubisoft.
Believe it or not, it may seem like all the workers at
Ubisoft turn up in a grey suit that absorbs the colour of the objects around it
and the employees at GameFreak turn up in fuckin cosplay, but they are both dev
studios, and they both do *technically* the same job. And while we have no info
on Watch Dogs Legion, I reckon we’ve got a good case for GF’s laziness, based on
that alone.
Ya know,if Legion has over 1000 distinct character models,
all with their own personalities, animations, weapons, and missions, I won’t
eat my hat, I’ll eat my entire fucking wardrobe.
Having never played a Watch
Dogs I am optimistic but realistic at the same time. But I expect at least a couple
of hundred based on what they’ve said. A living, breathing London, with every non-enemy
NPC being a potential playable character? That sounds like a hell of a lot more
effort than copying and pasting the other 500 fucking odd mon that you accidentally
sent to the recycle bin rather than the ‘Sword and Shield’ folder on your
Windows 99 PC.
I’m inclined to say Nintendo is putting pressure of the not
Pokemon Company, but if that were the case, I feel like they’d be putting
pressure on Animal Crossing too. On top of that, the Q3/Q4 releases for Switch
are beyond fucking ridiculous. Even on my 7 hours a week minimum wage, I can’t afford
more than Mario Maker, Link’s Awakening and Fire Emblem, so God knows how the
under 16s will keep up. No. Nintendo now seem too determined to stay on the
right side of the press and minimise crunch. This is independent of them. Let’s
move to the real problem here.
GameFreak are fantastic at sprite work. Every single Pokemon
in the national dex in Gen V is absolutely gorgeous. Every town stands out,
every city pops out of the screen of the console I’m playing on. Until we hit
XY. And don’t get me wrong, the Pokemon models are beautiful. But describe to
me the layout of one town from XY/SM I fucking dare you. They’re bland, they’re
forgettable, every building looks the exact same. This is the real problem.
GameFreak are not capable of being an AAA developer in the late 2010s.
They are riding a gimmick, a franchise, that they know
sells. If Pokemon weren’t the worldwide phenomenon it is, a new Poke game would
not sell compared to other contemporary RPG’s, they are ugly, they lack depth,
and they’re nigh on broken beyond belief. The current controversy is just the
beginning. This is either the beginning of a new age of Pokemon, or the
beginning of the end. Either somebody competent will fix GF’s mistakes, or the
franchise will lose the majority of its player base. I hope it is the former.
Genius Sonority were modelling 3D Pokemon way before it was cool,
right back on the GameCube and have done a cracking job ever since. Come on
GameFreak, this is the fucking help you need. I don’t want excuses about balancing
or time restraints. I want to transfer my hard earned, hard caught, hard bred Pokemon,
to be brought to life on a home console. If it isn’t too much to ask.
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